Dear Cheaters: an open letter to all y’all selfish, lying motherfuckers

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Dear Cheaters,

Y’all some selfish motherfuckers. Oh wait I already said that in the title.

Anyways, I have a message for you all.

Wait. Let me preface this by stating that I’ve never been cheated on. I have to say that because motherfuckers online think they know your whole life story based off of a few sentences. Oh, she’s just a bitter bitch.

I was asked to write this post by a good friend. I oblige all of my readers who want me to explore a certain topic. (Send me your ideas. Check the contact page for the info.)

So what do I know about cheating, then?


I know people who’ve been cheated on. I’ve slept with cheaters. (Tisk tisk.) Came pretty close to cheating once or twice. (Which prompted me to end the relationship before anything progressed. Kudos to me.) I’m friends with some cheaters. (And I’ll have no qualms about shooting them this link because I’m a G.)

My friend came across this article that stated that if you really love someone, you wouldn’t cheat on them so if you do cheat, you’re not in love with that person. You may love them, but it’s not enough if you intentionally put your private parts in someone else’s mouth.

Hmm. Hmm. (That’s what I do when I’m thinking.)

It’s a premise that the wiser seems to already have figured out. A friend who’s a bit older than me told me this before. “You may have loved them at one point in time and you may fall in love with them again after you cheat,” she said, “But in the moment you cheat, you’re not in love. You may love them in the sense that you care about them, but you’re not in love. But love comes in waves like that.”

“Here’s a secret: I’ve cheated before,” another friend, this one with 30 years under his belt told me, to which I gasped in mock disbelief. He had a pretty similar view on cheating. “You’re not being honest with yourself,” he said, “You know that this person isn’t right for you.”

Hmm. Hmm.

Enough about that. 

We all have a choice. Why you deliberately choose to hurt someone who loves you, I don’t know.

The disrespect that ensues is bad enough, but the pain that follows. . . Wooh! I can only imagine, and I’ve been through some pretty tough breakups. The twisted deceit, the shattering of trust.

Think of your self-esteem like a pristine mirror and when your significant other cheats on you, he or she throws a huge rock and destroys it. Is it something I did? Was I not pretty or handsome enough? Am I too thin or too fat or too scrawny? What did I do wrong? Why wasn’t I  good enough? Why wasn’t my love enough? You throw them into a deep misery.

I’ll never forget what one of the strongest people emotionally said about the time she got cheated on. “It’s just terrible. Gosh. It changes your whole view of  yourself.” Even people who are mountains move from the pain of infidelity.

If you still can’t see what’s wrong about cheating, go watch the movie “A Thin Line Between Love and Hate” right now! That’ll scare you into keeping it in your pants.

On a serious note, a lot of y’all aren’t even in the space to love someone else. Whether it’s immaturity, mommy/daddy issues, or general self-love issues, of course you don’t value your romantic relationships because you all don’t value yourselves. So just be alone, man.

Lynn Whitfield was a crazy bitch in this movie.

Lynn Whitfield was a crazy bitch in this movie.

Besides, don’t you want one of those realass relationships anyways? One that’ll make you so happy that you wouldn’t even DARE jeopardize the relationship and risk taking away your rainbow of happiness? One in which the thought of seeing your lover so hurt over something you did gives you mental agony from just thinking about it? Someone you thought you really couldn’t live without? You’d be so in love you’d turn down George Clooney/Scarlett Johansson/or whichever hot celebrity. (Young Jeezy in my case).

It’s possible.

Cheaters, you don’t deserve the person you cheated on. Let them go. If not so they can find their happiness, do it so you can find yours.

Sincurrly Yourz,

Layla A. Reaves



Don’t think you won’t get caught! The truth always comes to light.

Happy Birthday, Ange!

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Categories: Relationships


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